Like I told you, she said to me, "The facts speak for themselves."

That sticks in my brain. I don't know what facts we mean. Whose facts? Only the new facts, the now facts? Do those unDO the old facts?

Everyone is so sure of everything. He wasn't the person for you. You aren't the person he loves. That is the way it works. You lose. Move on.

I don't feel so sure. I just feel ragged. I have to move on, otherwise the razor edges of all my loose ends will shred me. More than I feel shredded now.

Do you just feel friendly toward me now? Are we FRIENDS to you? How can you uncheck that box so fast?

Because you are not my friend.

It feels like everything and everyone has so quickly subscribed to the idea that this is normal, that people just up and stop loving one person and start in on another. It seems the forgotten truth that everything you did was so CRAZY. So, NOT that simple. I don't feel like it fits into boxes that clearly. Course, that is because I am the one who got the empty cup at the end of that crazy game. If I were her, I would jump on that idea too. It's the only way to get by, to believe in it, to live it. So, that's where I am left.

Standing on a street corner, holding an empty cup, thinking...September. October. When will I not miss you? Want you here in my city, my room. What I wouldn't give to walk with you, sit in a car next to you, hold your hand. Feel that way.

I am not sure at all. And none of the answers make me feel better, feel good again.

I am a box. Not a cube. An empty, two dimensional drawing. 4 lines, make a square.

I miss you, I guess that is it. Maybe if I could stop missing you, none of these issues would matter. Bc...whatever, I don't want you anyway. Right? That's how it will work?

September...October.